The Life of A Young Poet

My youngest sister Abigail is eleven this year, and she just so happens to be the owner/writer at "Abigail's Pick-Your-Own Poems". The nice thing about this poem shop is that you don't have to find a poem to fit your need. Abigail will write a poem for any imaginable topic you choose.

For example, one of my first orders I placed was for a poem on the topic of "Bob Dylan". This is what my 50 cents bought me:

Bob Dylan is strange.
In fact, he is very strange.
I would even say
he's in the weirdo range.

After her and I had a conversation about beheading last week, I placed another order and once again it really paid off. I will type it as written.

"Beheading"
by: Abigail Hill

Here I go to the beheading
room, here awaits me death
and doom.

Here it comes, shines like
Ice, here's my head, ready
to slice.

Oh! It hurts! Oh! the pain,
like running your fingers
through a tangly mane

I have my few seconds
to look around, I have my
few seconds, to hear
my last sound

(Please flip 4 last stanza)

But good thing I'm a
Christian, cause I'll live
forever. I'll never go again
to that deadly old room,
no never.

Thank you for your business!
-----------

Contact me for Abigail's phone number and you can Pick-Your-Own too.

Genius

Pastor Roger Byrd said that he just wanted to get people thinking. So last Thursday, he put a new message on the sign at the Jonesville Church of God. Byrd said that the message wasn't meant to be racial or political."It's simply to cause people to realize and to see what possibly could happen if we were to get someone in there that does not believe in Jesus Christ," he said.

The message has been changed because of public outcry to: "Roger Byrd, Brains of Turd, Humm, Are They Brothers?"

The Queen

I knew I wouldn't get far into blogging until I started bragging about my hero. If you know me, you know I like the music. And if you've heard my music, you know it consists mainly of these beauties:



If this video alone doesn't explain why I believe this true grit of a girl is probably the most influential woman on the planet, let me lay down this little story for you:

We found out that Dolly has a program where she'll send a book to your child every month for free. Free books from the Dolly Partons. So I called in to find out how to sign Leon up for it and guess who answered the phone?

Dolly. No joke.

I thought it was a joke at first, but she assured me it was her and that she takes calls from time to time in between primpin'. (Such sass!) So here's the deal straight from the horses mouth. Dolly says she is sending Leon a free book every month until he graduates high school. I asked her the obvious question and she said that if he doesn't graduate he'll get the books for the rest of his life. It really is a win-win in Dolly's world!

Sign up your child or high school drop out today!

A complete recap of the last 30 years

So there's these two crazy bloggers living with me now and they've really turned me on to the idea of keeping a detailed account of my life on the internet for all to see. It's really working for them. I've tried this before, but that was before my life got so amazing. In fact, my life is so amazing I may have to start another blog for the overspill of the incredible things that happen to me in the span of a day. Prepare your hearts and minds. Every eye closed, and every head bowed.

Just to catch everyone up, Beth and I have somehow created another human we have named "Leon". We named him after Leon Hendrix (the great Jimi's brother). This little human has changed our lives completely (like his namesake). He has just started talking, but it is all either French or Portuguese, so we can't understand a word of it. I suspect it is mostly friendly talk.

We live in the great unexplored state of Tennessee, and are mostly enjoying it here. We run a little "Urban Homestead" right near downtown. We have chickens, a rooster, goats, a dog, a cat, several fish, an emu, and have spotted some snakes. We're fairly serious gardeners, and this year plan on eating only from the garden, except for meat, which according to last years experiments will not grow in a garden no matter how much you water it.

For those who met us through "church circles", it will embarrass you to know we have completely given up on that whole scene. Instead we now follow a little daily calendar we found at the flea market that gives us guidance for everyday of our lives. Today's guidance: "If you're not soaring with the eagles, then you're on the ground with the turkeys."

We have chosen to soar.